Ego (my definition) – that thing that decides for other people how they are going to think, feel, and respond to everything you do and then stops you from doing the things you want to prevent yourself from feel embarrassed. It’s that thing that doesn’t give others an opportunity to decide how they feel about your actions for themselves.
Two things that I need to keep reminding myself of:
- My ego is arrogant because it doesn’t let other humans decide things about me for themselves (like they aren’t already doing that). It keeps me from being my genuine self and makes me act weirder than just doing the thing I want would ever be out of a fear of being embarrassed.
- The thing about embarrassment – every human on the planet hates being embarrassed. And it’s not a fatal condition. I checked, and couldn’t find one single instance of someone dying from it. (Teenage histrionics are as close as one can get, I think).
So ego is really just a fear of dying from embarrassment, which isn’t a real thing. It’s very nice of it to want to protect you, but it makes you act strangely. It’s so not Femme Fatale. And it’s time for me, at least, to get it in check.
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Femme Fatale over 50 